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Office, Workplace & Employment
Humor, Jokes & Cartoons
Funny stuff and humor for the 9-to-5 crowd, the 3-11 gang, and the 11 to 7 peeps, or whatever shift you may work!
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The Working Folks Humor Pages:

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Resolving to surprise her husband, an executive's wife stopped by his office. She found him with his secretary sitting in his lap.
    Without hesitating, he dictated, "...and in conclusion, gentlemen, shortage or no shortage, I cannot continue to operate this office with just one chair."


If you are good,
you will be assigned all the work.
If you are really good,
you will get out of it. 


You can go anywhere you want
if you look serious and carry a clipboard.


The phrase "working mother" is redundant.
-- Jane Sellman


I found being an electrician interesting,
but the work was shocking.


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The Working Folks
Humor Pages

from ButlerWebs.com

Working Folks - Page 1
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Top 11 Reasons to Go to Work Naked

  1. Your boss is always yelling, "I wanna see your butt in here by 8:00!"
  2. Can take advantage of computer monitor radiation to work on your tan.
  3. Inventive way to finally meet that hunk in Human Resources.
  4. "I'd love to chip in, but I left my wallet in my pants."
  5. To stop those creepy guys in Marketing from looking down your blouse.
  6. You want to see if it's like the dream.
  7. So that, with a little help from Muzak, you can add "Exotic Dancer" to your exaggerated resume.
  8. People stop stealing your pens after they've seen where you keep them.
  9. Diverts attention from the fact that you also came to work drunk.
  10. Gives "bad hair day" a whole new meaning.
  11. No one steals your chair.


"If you don't like your job you don't strike.
You just go in every day and do it really half-assed.
That's the American way."
-- Homer Simpson.


This isn't an office.  It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.


All rumors are true – especially if your boss denies them.


Will the Real Dummy Please Stand Up?

AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months saying he lacked intellectual leadership. He received a $26 million severance package.  Perhaps it's not Walter who's lacking intelligence.


I got a job at a zoo feeding giraffes but I was fired because I wasn't up to it.


    I did stop a thief at work once. He would go to our break room and steal someone's lunch they had brought.  I went home one day and made a batch of fudge brownies and melted a box of Ex-Lax and put into the dough.  Then I took another box and melted it in the microwave and coated the tops of the brownies.  Took them to work, placed them on the table, covered with Saran wrap and left the break room.  Some of us watched the person go to the break room and waited.  About 30 minutes later, we saw him run by us toward the office and then quickly out of the office and out the front door.  Needless to say he was out of work a couple of days with the dreaded "runs" but we no longer had to worry about him taking our lunches!


Did You Know?
25 million Americans are rotating shift workers. Studies suggest that 20 to 30% of those with non-traditional work schedules have had a fatigue-related driving mishap within the last year. The drive home from work after the night shift is likely to be a particularly dangerous one. (Source: National Sleep Foundation Web Site - Facts About Drowsy Driving: www.sleepfoundation.org/activities/daaafacts.html)

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Murphy's Law:
There will always be beer cans rolling on the floor of your car
when the boss asks for a ride home from the office.


     A salesman dropped in to see a business customer. Not a soul was in the office except a big dog emptying wastebaskets.
     The salesman stared at the animal, wondering if his imagination could be playing tricks on him.
     The dog looked up and said, "Don't be surprised. This is just part of my job."
     "Incredible!" exclaimed the man. "I can't believe it!  Does your boss know what a prize he has in you?  An animal that can talk!"
     "No, no," pleaded the dog. "Please don't tell him!  If that man finds out I can talk, he'll make me answer the phone as well!"


I wanted to be a barber, but I just couldn't cut it.


     A business owner decides to take a tour around his business and see how things are going. He goes down to the shipping docks and sees a young man leaning against the wall doing nothing.
     The owner walks up to the young man and says, "Son, how much do you make a day?"
     The guy replies, "150 dollars."
     The owner pulls out his wallet, gives him $150, and tells him to get out and never come back.
     A few minutes later, the shipping clerk asks the owner, "Have you seen that UPS driver?? I asked him to wait here for me!"


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Although they restricted themselves to one drink at lunch time, Howard and Tom still found they were not at their most productive in the afternoons.


The following short quiz consists of 4 questions and tells whether you are qualified to be a "manager".  The questions are not that difficult.

  1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?
    The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe and close the door.  This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way.
  2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?
    Wrong Answer :  Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant and close the refrigerator.
    Correct Answer : Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door.
    This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your actions.
  3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend except one. Which animal does not attend?
    Correct Answer :  The Elephant.  The Elephant is in the refrigerator. This tests your memory.

OK, even if you did not answer the first three questions correctly, you still have one more chance to show your abilities.

  1. There is a river you must cross. But it is inhabited by crocodiles. How do you manage it?
    Correct Answer:  You swim across. All the Crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting! This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.

According to Andersen Consulting World wide, around 90% of the professionals they tested got all questions wrong.  But many pre-schoolers got several correct answers. Andersen Consulting says this conclusively disproves the theory that most management consultants have the brains of a four year old.

Submitted by Powder


Did You Know?
Clans of long ago that wanted to get rid of their unwanted people without killing them would burn their houses down - hence the expression "to get fired".

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The Salary Axiom:
The pay raise is just large enough to increase your taxes and just small enough to have no effect on your take-home pay.


To All Employees:

To maximize productivity and make us more efficient, we are going to modify all work
areas as shown below:

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It is expected that this change will increase productivity by approximately 4.58%.


See more Workplace Humor from ButlerWebs...
Working Folks - Office Humor - Page 2 ] Working Folks - Office Humor - Page 3 ] Working Folks - Office Humor - Page 4 ] Working Folks - Office Humor - Page 5 ] Links to Other Workplace Humor Web Sites ]

Jobs That Suck


See more Workplace Humor from ButlerWebs' 100's of Jokes & Cartoons
Page 1 of Working Folks & Office Humor
Page 2 of Working Folks & Office Humor
Page 3 of Working Folks & Office Humor
Page 4 of Working Folks & Office Humor
Page 5 of Working Folks & Office Humor

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Quick Links to the Working Folks Humor Pages from ButlerWebs:
[ Working Folks - Page 1 Working Folks - Office Humor - Page 2 ] Working Folks - Office Humor - Page 3 ] Working Folks - Office Humor - Page 4 ] Working Folks - Office Humor - Page 5 ] Links to Other Workplace Humor Web Sites ]

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This page was last edited 10/17/07.


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